Discussions about screen use have long focused on children and teenagers: How many hours can they watch YouTube? When should a child get their first smartphone? Is social media appropriate for them?

But a new study suggests the problem may not lie solely with children, but with parents who spend excessive time on their phones—something that can negatively impact their relationship with their children and leave psychological effects that last for years.

Children feel ignored

According to a study published last month in the scientific journal Frontiers in Psychology, which surveyed 600 American teenagers aged 12 to 17, a large number of participants confirmed that they feel ignored or neglected when their parents are engrossed in their phones while interacting with them.

The study clarifies that the problem is not the phone itself, but the child's feeling that their parents are physically present but emotionally absent.

Effects that may last a lifetime

Researchers found that excessive parental phone use can lead to what is known as 'insecure attachment,' a psychological pattern that may make children more prone to anxiety, less trusting of others, and more likely to avoid social relationships as they grow older.

Don Grant, a media and addiction psychologist and member of the American Psychological Association, said these effects can persist into adulthood if not addressed early.

He added that the impact is not about the number of hours parents spend on their phones, but rather how attentive they are to their children when they are together.

Present, but with eyes on the screen

The study included examples of parents who made sure to attend school events or sports games for their children, but the children did not remember their presence as much as they remembered that their parents were looking at their phones the whole time instead of watching the event or interacting with them.

Researchers note that such situations leave a deep emotional impression on children, even if parents think they are fulfilling their duty simply by being present.

The concept of technoference

The study is based on a concept known as 'technoference,' which refers to the effect of digital devices in weakening direct interaction between people.

Previous research focused on the impact of this phenomenon on marital relationships, but the new study expands its scope to include parent-child relationships, confirming that smart devices may hinder the building of strong emotional bonds within the family.

The findings also align with other data cited by Bloomberg, as a 2024 Pew Research Center survey found that nearly half of American teenagers said their parents are distracted by their phones while talking to them, while far fewer parents believed this was happening.

The most important message

The study concludes that excessive focus on children's screen time may have overlooked a more important aspect: the behavior that children observe in their parents.

Children typically do not remember the hours they spent in front of devices as much as they remember the moments they tried to connect with their parents but found their eyes glued to phone screens instead of looking at them.

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